White man in a foreign land

April 24th, 2013

Lisbon, Portugal

Song of the Day: Evolution of Music by Pentatonix

Mood: Saturated

White man in a foreign land

As I travel throughout Asia, strangers treat me differently because I am white.

The good

People are often kind to tourists and foreigners. If I ask a question, people generously help me. When some of my American-born Chinese friends have visited China and asked questions, people look at them like they are mentally challenged and chastised them if they are not fluent. On the flip side, if I try to say "hello" or "thank you" in the local language, even if I have bad intonation people smile and get excited.

For a short time, it is fun to be treated like a VIP. Many people came up to me because they want to take a picture with a white person. I even received autograph requests.

I have no idea who any of this guy is (Shwedagon Pagoda, Myanmar)

A local cafe owner in Bagan, Myanmar, has a business in which she
brings locals to monuments to take pictures with white people

It has happened often throughout Asia such as at Nanjing Lu in Shanghai:

The bad

While it is fun to be a novelty, it would be frustrating to live there long-term as a white person. Even if I was involved in the community for years, strangers would continue to assume I am an outsider. I would feel powerless and judged by physical traits that are outside my control. It would be hard to feel like I belonged. DJ Busy Bee has lived and studied in China for years. Even when he would ask someone a question in Chinese, they would respond in grunts and hand motions instead of Chinese because he was white.

The ugly

My experience as a white person living in a 92% black neighborhood in Detroit informed me of the difficulties of living cross culturally long-term. Most people treated me kindly, but I never felt like I belonged or would be accepted as a full member of the community. Over time, the little things get to you like when I walked down the street and a girl asked if I'm a vampire. Or, when my friends and I host a movie night for the neighborhood youth, and the older kids tell the younger kids, "Don't talk to white people. We can't trust them." Luckily, one of my black friends said, "It's okay. These white people are our friends." Still, I get upset at other times such as when people call my friends and threaten to kill all the white people from our church.

Simply, feeling like people are always judging you for something you can't control gets tiring and frustrating.

Reasons to live cross-culturally

Recognizing the difficulties, I would have to find a compelling  combination of the following six reasons to willingly live in a culture vastly different from my own:

1. Calling - If God leads, one should go

2. Opportunity – If I had a skill set that is not as developed in a different culture, I could make a relatively larger impact. This could either benefit my career or the positive difference I can make. This is why many Americans go to Asia.

After a successful NBA career, two-time all-star Stephon Marbury moved to
China where he plays for the Beijing Ducks. He also writes a column: Starbury News.

3. Fascination - diversity is often interesting and intriguing

Market in Shanghai. We don't have these in America 

4. Understanding – one can reflect on one's own culture in new ways by experiencing other cultures

Buddhists burning incense at Jing'an Temple

5. Exposure ­– Different cultures and ways of being can transform a person and lead to unique learning

Shanghai Museum of Contemporay Art 

6. Comfort – People can find a deeper sense of belonging in cultures outside the ones they grew up in such as due to their personality and life experiences

Overall, it's important to not glamorize living in a culture different than your own. There can be good reasons, but it is difficult.

Just as important, we need to realize how difficult it can be for people from underrepresented groups to acclimate into the culture of power. Society benefits when everyone's potential can be unlocked, but so often  people who are different are not empowered.

Jesus is a fascinating example in that he lived with people like him (12 Jewish dudes), but he frequently broke cultural norms to provide for the needs of the poor, the religious and ethnic minorities, and others who were often overlooked by society.